Living the Dream

Of course, I know that this concept is not old ways of our ancient ways, and, as a teacher, I, too have been guilty of using this concept as a way to involve students in study of their personal journey into knowing more about who they are; physically, intellectually, emotionally, and, perhaps, spiritually.  It was a place to begin with those who were not involved, or able to be involved, in their own traditional ways.  I found it wakened them, as I encouraged finding their own truths from their own elders.  I had to start somewhere as I believe that there is an awakening of (spiritual) interest if we began talking about what it means to look at the world, and our world, in another way.  I offered that it was only “A Way” to look at culture, not “The Way”.
 
So many of our Elders seem to be disheartened,  and there are so many that have forgotten, that, sometimes we have no place to turn to, to begin talking about Native People in the contexts of rigid constructions of academia.  So many children are left out, because of lack of interest of their parents, and further, their communities, that have almost completely assimilated into strict non-native belief system, to allow traditional ways to even be discussed.
 
What do we do, then, when integrity guides us to, at very least, offer what we can?  I have researched for native perspective on certain events ( i.e., Christopher Columbus hypocrisy).  I have gone to elders and tried to remain true to their guidance in what to offer a way to understand what makes us unique.
 
It is easy for those in strong communities to denigrate what little we can do in these hungry and halted circumstances.  The moment something is put on paper, it is null and void of the deep and abiding truths and connotations of The True Way. 
 
I have constantly struggled with my “less than ‘full’ blood”, “my white-education”, my lingering legacy of being a captured child raised in non-native home, the denigration at every turn from both races.  I have struggled with a strong spirit that guides me, and council of the only elders that were available to teach me and help me find my way through these many detours and detriments. 
 
Do we pull back and only teach the way of the history books that are accredited for use as curriculum, do we offer another way to think about “who we were/are”, do we stay as close to guidance of spirit and do the best we can with that, or do we totally abandon all nurturing in any way, of children who are hungry for a moment of spirit-revealed truth that may come from even a frail , and, yes, faulty fraction of a method for a chance revelation.
 
So many have been abandoned by their own.  Do we abandon them too because we do not have a strong and true traditionalist that is willing and able to come to quench their need to know?
 
Perhaps, rather than reacting negatively, we should spend this time empowering those in our communities that can set things aright.  Perhaps those who have the command, or perceive such, should go out into these places some of us have to
struggle in, and help those who are intent on awakening pride in a way that does not mis-step into the infringement of intricate and holy ways of a particular people, band, community, tribe.

It is very easy to find what is not right.  Perhaps time be best spent on focusing what is the best way and getting out, front-line, in those places where are those, like me, who want only to nurture children who seek false idols and ways and places to stave their hunger for something substantial to strengthen them in finding their personal walk into traditional ways.

I fear that once they shrug off a holistic way to approach this problem, they will then begin tribal skirmishes over the different and unique specifics.  What do we do when we have children with lineage to different, and opposing beliefs?  (Cree and Blackfoot, for instance)  My only answer was to follow advice from elders who were true to their spiritual guidance, am I to be denigrated for even this?

How lonely it has been to be someone who has chosen to follow the ways as guided by ceremonies and traditionalists of integrity in each of the different communities and tribal areas I have worked in.  I am grateful that many youth I have worked with, have gone on to search for their way in their own traditional ways.   I am grateful I have retired and, according to this, do no harm.

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