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No More Blind Eye

A cloistered world of bland chicken and vegetable dinners, made healthy for the programmed children who are in God’s little business led by power-hungry, addicted men who follow one leader into their own kind of misconstrued glory.  This is the RLDS life:  A life of foraging livestock, rutting bulls, and motherless calves.

The children are removed from a world that is not as we know it by media, but by having something somewhere in our past that helps us know how insidious this cult is.  No woman dares to question the men because the women are nothing more than abused women who are in love with their abusers.  The spiritual abuse being a top favorite.    Men can beat them, rape them, intellectually neglect them, emotionally warp them, and then, at the very height of control is spiritual control.  The women are lead to believe they can not get into the highest kingdom of heaven and be with their family UNLESS they are called by the man who has been given their secret name to call them into that kingdom by.  Oh, and be it known that the women do not know the men’s secret names.  So, the women are hostages, not only by body, mind, heart…but by soul as well.

Did you notice the deep horrorstruck looks in the women’s faces.  Did you think they were all suffering the loss of the children to CPS?  On a good day, there has to be a haunting.  There are the first wives who, give me a break, they are human after all, hate that their men are choosing these younger women for bed partners.  The powerless, the women, have nothing to control but other women and the children.  The trickle down aggression from this type of close communal living and adding such desperate denial of self and need has to haunt them.  Where does the anger go?  Consider some options.

These people are breaking the law.  An 1878 U.S. Supreme Court ruling in a religious-freedom case more or less settled the matter, saying polygamy is “an offense against society . . . (that) shall not be allowed.”  The decision to remove these children should stem just from the fact that any common everyday mother in society or father, for that matter, if they are criminals, have their children removed.  The only reason that this is such newsworthy fodder is that the government has waited so long before they finally stepped up to their legal tables and are finally doing something to protect the children and the women.  (Yes, this will give a great deal of the women a chance to get away if they have been living in unbearable situations.  I am sure there will be some who will gratefully leave that hell, even at the chance of going to another hell.)

I know a little of what I speak in that I gave up the “highest kingdom” to save myself and my younger children from a completely holistically abusive  situation that did not involve polygamy, but a abusive nonetheless.  The environment represents a significant risk for abuse for all the women and children when such obsessive holistic control is the base of a religion.

The competition is stiff.  The women have their own insidious ways of snatching and gaining control.  The children are passively aggressively competing for attention.  The men barter like men standing on a fence looking at cattle on the sale block.  They watch and wait for their chance to ‘own’.  Their own sons are seen as competitors.  It turns sisters against sisters, brothers against brothers, sons against fathers, daughters again mothers.  It can not help but.  There is a pervasive pattern and practice of undermining each pother to get the ‘most’, the ‘best’ as if standing on the heads of wives and breeding more girls lifts them higher to holy.

I totally agree with Judge Barbara Walther’s response to attorney’s concerns about not keeping the adult mothers with their younger children, when she highlighted CPS’ position by saying that, “the mothers had placed their children at risk for abuse in the FLDS setting.” This is as true with these people as it is in mainstream society.  Very often a mother who was abused will not protect her own children, will not see it, will deny it is happening, will project totally illogical reasons for it happening.  Until these mothers get help and understand how abused they are, they should not be able to get their children back.  Bottom line, women in mainstream society are going through such counseling for such reason every day.

The birth of a daughter must be a true sick joy:  More girls added to the complaint herd.  This is a theocracy where women are nothing but property, pack mules, breed mares, and serve two roles and only two roles:  please the men sexually and have children (girls preferred).  The women , as was shown, have such stilted speech and such flat countenance.  They may have been born into this but it is now up to them to make the decision…the man or the children.  They should be charged if they take their children back into such abusive situations, just like the rest of us would be. Dr. Drew Pinksy, spoke of how the women were talking with “little girl voices” and it is a VERY real mental deficiency that often occurs with either abuse, sexually, emotionally, physically or all of the above.  Anyone who has worked with sexual abuse survivors recognizes this affect.  These women are taught to obey their husbands and have as many children as possible to build their kingdom. Those are their keys to heaven. That is how they are measured as worthy.  They are taught from as soon as they can be taught that women have no control over their own lives, their own body, or their own children. All the decisions are made by their husband and by the church leaders on behalf of their warped definition and connotation of their “God”.  The only power they can gain is to win their husband’s favor through sexuality and gain some minimal influence, which automatically seeps out into rivalry and backstabbing of his other wives.  They have nowhere to turn.  No one will help you, no one will listen.  You are isolated from those who can.  They are held prisoner and are trapped until they are willing to give up everything that is holy to them.  They are nothing but chattel/slaves.  They are told to leave would put them in the outside evil and escaping is an insult to their God.  To reject or question the practices is to defy the word of their God.  They are influenced to believe the outside hell is worse than the inside hell.  So many of these women are in denial.  They have to be.  Their self-esteem ahs to be some of the lowest recorded in order to stay … no wonder they are so numb.

I am hearing a great deal of the emotional trauma the children in their new foster care will be going through.  That concern is such pathetic pandering.  The emotional distress and abuse they have gone through in that commune is much more than having to deal with mainstream society.  The emotional trauma experienced prior to the taking is so deep and insidious that it will take years to unearth.  Those male potential pedophiles have had total control of their daily lives by themselves or through the women they yank along like lead cows.  I am sure one of the problems for these children, and the women who escape with them, will be to feel authentic emotional feelings and make decisions according to them.  All will need to be deprogrammed.

The public does not have all the facts.  We can not base our belief or disbelief that the children should have been or should not have been removed on what we are allowed to know through the media.  When all the facts come out, and I do not believe it will be for a long long time, even the hardest of hearts will be broken over what they have gone through.  These children were not casually removed.  I know a little more about such religious workings and I had a tough time because I was not an everyday bleating sheep.  I have been shunned for decades now for leaving.

A crime is a crime.  Religion’s guise is no right or reason for it.  No excuses.  No exceptions.  Do for those children what you would expect to be done for your own grandchildren, your nieces, your nephews.  Get them out and give truth a chance to be told.  If the parents want their children, they can leave what has been a crime and part of criminal actions and get help.  We ask no more of mothers in mainstream society, as I said.  (Make note that a professor took his seven year old son to a ballgame and bought him some lemonade, not knowing that Mike’s Hard Lemonade had liquor in it.  Yes, there are some of us who do not know such things.  And his child was removed for two days and put into care.)  No exceptions.  The law for one is the law for all.

This is not really just about religion or personal choices.  This is about freedom from physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual harm.  The thought processes of the adults may be clouded.  I can not believe that they would agree to such abuses if they were not clouded by brainwashed confusion.  They must now break the cycle the only way they can.

At some point we have to see polygamy as harmful to society in that it encourages gender inequality.  The men who think this is an easy way to live, and chuckle in their hands about how lucky, ha ha, snicker snicker, have no idea whatsoever about how it feels to be with someone who has lost their freewill.  Slaves do not make deep and emotional bed partners who share spiritual sexuality.  All you would get is dull duty.

Slavery was thought never going to be able to be extinguished.  But, look, it was.  But look , as well, how long it is taking to rid our society of the residuals.   We know well of those victims who fell in love with their abusers.  These women, many of them, would sooner cut their own tongues out that speak their truth.  There will be lifelong devastating ramifications for these children and women.  Those who were brave enough to leave prior to this are to be commended for speaking out now for the children and the women…their sisters.

Yes, these people can live how they like, they can believe in a religion of their choice, they can raise their children as they like, but they can not abuse each other and the children.  Those of us who know the will and willfulness of a group who wields such control, know that these children need to be taken out of that kind of environment.  It is not just the earth that needs saving, my god, the children.  The Children!  It is better to have the trauma of being removed than to be couched, trained, and controlled into being a sexual/breeding object.  Submissiveness of this type is not “normal”, it is well-ordered and rightly controlled.  The only way to freedom for these children is to get them out until they are old enough to make true self-evolved choices about that old world of controlling absolute patriarchy.

There are other residuals that are questionable in that society:  manipulation of the system, welfare abuse, incest, wife battering, tax frauds, limited educational opportunities, over-taxed public services, lack of medical attention, Medicaid abuses, poverty, genetic diseases, forced marriages;  but these are not as worrisome as the abuse of the young girls and women, and of course, the young boys who become seen as rivals to those old men.

The obvious lack of enforcement has lead to such large numbers of children being removed at one time.  The children, though, are the greatest victims of all this not happening sooner.  They had no choice.  They are being victimized in another way because of it all, yes, they are!  Basic civil rights have been taken away at the moment of birth.  Somehow all the abuse and the fraud must be stopped.  It is up to us to support the CPS as they do what HAD to be done.  To go against these CPS is to stand on the side of polygamy’s intolerable acts. I, for one, consider these children lucky…… I know what it was like to be an adult woman and try to find a way to remove myself from such insidious spiritual control.  I choose their definition of going to hell…and I have been in heaven since then.  Of course, there are residuals, and these I fight off every day of my life.  It has turned children against mother, mother against family, but I surrendered to the belief that it was between me and my God, not between me and the Patriarchs and then God.  I had to see Creator as a loving God who would understand, even if I was wrong.  Creator has since blessed me a thousand-fold in ways that I could never have known had I not freed myself from someone else’s prescription for spirituality.  I cannot go forward without turning back and seeing what is happening and stop my passive acceptance of what has been going on right beneath our eyes.

Oh child, you with your hair looped

down your back, your dress like my ancestor’s,

your eyes blank and polite

you are being prepared, cut to a pattern

like eyelet cropped to fit apron,

your joy stitched to the length of your hem

from the ground you will pace like a calfless cow

Oh child, dreams cut sharp around your ears,

hopes snapped in your western shirt,

groomed like a farmer, a cattleman,

a keeper of fences and women

How I ache for you to know freedom

from those things I can only guess at

What I do know, children, is your programming,

your guilt, the oppressed spirit

that leaves you little personal passion,

few moments of joy like Sunday’s feet

swinging beneath the pew, because they can

What I do wish is for justice for this cropping,

this pinched petal childhood to be nurtured

so you know flowers are not here to compete

but to enhance your uniqueness

Children, you are not common at all,

nor plain, nor simple and we have been silent

and slow in rescuing you from a maelstrom

that would sweep your beauty beneath the feet of Elders

Come, come, know what real love is,

what parenting can do to encourage you to fly

your own dear and deep path you can carve in an endless sky

where anything is possible, even to you

who were almost grounded already

Come, I am not your enemy.  I am the child

who thought heretical thoughts in Church

about not feeling guilty for being born,

who wants you to dance until your hair leaps free,

until your stones in your pockets fall out

and the ground sings at your unfolding

I can no longer turn a blind eye to your predicament.

The Experiencer

“Every experience has three possible ingredients:  sense perceptions, thoughts or mental images, and emotions.” (p241)without the experiencer, there is no experience.  The experiencer is spirit and indefinable but The Knower.  The Knower resides in that peaceful, serene silence; the silence we experience that is not silence at all.  There is a toning down of outside noise so we can hear the silence.  We cannot force the ears to hear any more than we can force the Experiencer to experience.

That stillness within does not need to define its experience, it feels it and that feeling floods every cell with ancient knowing that can not be defined by simple language.  It is ever coursing through the body, and without the body, never stopping, never resting, in wait for our recognition of it.  It is the well in which great ancient wisdoms have been poured and we access that filling in those moments of awareness, as the Experiencer.

This Divine Source rises up to meet its commonality.  That, I believe is the surge we feel within when we have what we call an “epiphany”.  It is from this place that all we ever need or know is lapping.  Betimes, when this Oneness spills over into every day life, it is not felt by just that person, but by all around it.  It is like a magnetic energy that is drawn to the original source within all.  We have all met magnetic people or have witnessed magnetic personalities who may only be magnetic for that moment.  It tends to evolve from a magical, spiritual, a non-interpretable moment.   It just is, and in that moment of Is-ness, timelessness and entity abide.

We may experience this timelessness and spaciousness in gaps between thought and action.  It may come as inspiration, as creative spark, and almost a soul sigh.  Have you ever felt your soul sigh?  I have.  I have.  The more I became aware of those, the more I searched for those kinds of opportunities, but it seems to come at its own will not mine.  There is neither strain nor work needed.  Simply breathe it through and allow it its own time and deep richness.  Eckhart speaks to the breathing as a way to connect to Oneness on p 245 - 248.

We have no claim of power on our role as Experiencer.  Our experiences are unique as we are unique as individuals.  But, at the  core of the experience is Oneness and an ancient wisdom to be processed.  Many of us wish not to have experienced, or to, now, or later, experience some experiences.  I have to tell you, I am not sorry for anything I experienced.  Every experience has the potential for great lessons, great sense of Oneness.  We can only choose how we allow an experience to influence us.  Do we allow it to go to the deepest center of our souls, or do we merely allow it the surface entry to Ego?

Just be.  Be the Experiencer at deep and dear levels of soul.  Let our senses seep down and into that core of Oneness and we will see that we have no way to explain it, but we just know we have been changed.

Perceiving Without Naming

Grass is greener on the other side of the fence, they say.  I have come to know this is not true.  We simply forget to appreciate what we have and devalue it.  Our minds work in peculiar ways.  Eckhart suggest we need to get over ourselves, I think, when he says that unconscious naming must cease so we can become aware of space. To me, it is an distanced illusion that grass is greener; a trick of the eye.  If the eye can trick us, consider what the mind can do.  Ego envies what it thinks others have and memory seems to close the door to new ways at looking what happened in our past, what is happening now and what might happen.  It is warped thinking to say “those were the good old days” as if they were, and they most likely weren’t.  Nothing is all good or all not good.

We observe things in a bias’d way.  We experienced things as we wished to experience them.  We have made judgments according to our conditioning and experiences as we have decided was Truth.  We have distorted things in order to justify our self-esteem or lack of it.  We became “Ego-I” people and evaluated and discriminated against ideas without consideration of Oneness.  We cannot be faulted until we become aware that what we have believed is not our truth, once we know the truth of Oneness, we can no longer fool ourselves or others.

Consider some of the following, as I have, in trying to figure out how I came to this single-minded idea of who I am, where I am, and why I am.  You will recognize some of them, I am sure.

Consider that parts of memory fades.  Perhaps some sensual parts of memory are embedded in the body; think comfort food, think knee-jerk reactions, think of your favorite childhood smell, sound, feeling.  But the whole memory is not there, simply fragments that the mind chooses to remember for whatever reason.  Consider that we have those moments we have lapses of memory and are absent-minded.  My mother once put her shoes in the fridge.  And some people have blocked their memories since they could not deal with things and it was easier.  I am sure you have heard of people who say “I have no memory before the age of thirteen…school, etc.”  We may also have misattributed fragments of memories so time, place, people are sometimes wrong.  Our memories are also distorted by Ego, by experiences of Ego, by guilt, by anger, by all of the emotions.  You know how some see perfection in a new partner and then realize that partner was not quite as perfect as they wished.  Ah, and then there are not just the great memories, there are those that we wish we could forget and can’t.

Memory comes from things we focused on.  We become selective about what we wish to remember and for reasons we wish to forget or remember them.  We magnify either the positive or negative according to how the Ego wishes to be fed.  Sometimes our memory is filled in with things we fabricate to justify their happening.  Imagination and true memory gets mucked up together.  True memories get filled in with false memories.

We prefer to consider things of the past in the light of how we were exposed to them.  We recall feelings of an incident because that strongly influences our cognitive judgments.  We like…we don’t like…because…  it is familiar, or compelling and we have already drawn conclusions about it.  In fact, we seldom check why we like or do not like something.  We think we simply do.  When we check back to see why we are deathly afraid of a spider…we will inevitably go back to the first real experience we had with one and choose the part that we choose to have us label that thing good or not good.  This can also lead to over-generalizing because of this little piece of personal evidence.  The story of the blind men and the elephant comes to mind.  There needs be no logic to it, we have simply made it our truth by some little part of an experience.  Once we have a belief, we will stubbornly hang on to it to feed our PainBody/Ego and make allsorts of assumptions about something.  People can give evidence about us being wrong, but if we are sold-out to labeling, remembering, or concluding a certain point of view, our Ego really hates to give up on it.  Denial can be really useful when you are all about being right rather than true.

Mixed up in all this is our sense that life just isn’t fair:  That green grass.  Self-righteousness is a real Ego trip. No, life isn’t always fair, but I believe it does balance out Universally.  Of course, some people choose to use this unfairness as a way to ‘catastrophize’ every bit of negativity and magnify it to full blown puddles of pity that gets them the kind of attention Ego wants.  It hungers for it.  It labels small things big and big things something that was somehow deserved.  But, label it the Ego will so it can go into histrionics which inevitably gets the kind of attention it desires and sometimes needs to keep up the label.    People who are pessimistic because they have labeled so many things “unfair” will inevitably have their Ego tell them they are right and search for proof, however warped.  They will blame others for the pain they feel because that is easier than accepting that there were other choices they could have made.  Sometimes life is fair, but often it is not.  No one is coming to save us.  We are responsible for our own lvies, our own happiness, our own misery.  No one can make us feel anything we do not wish to feel.

Labeling is Self-centered activity.  Everything is not about US.  In the context of Universal rhythms, we are miniscule.  We can not understand our own behavior and intents, if we are not true to the Oneness.  Pain-body people bump in to other pain-body people.  We judge each other without considering cause and can become so enamored of the I-effect.  Never is anything all black or all white, all good, all bad, all negative, all positive in this life.      There are alternatives, but sometimes we see things so one-way that we miss them.  I love the story of the Zen master who offered his students a cup of tea and said, “If you drink that tea I will beat you:  If you do not drink that tea, I am going to beat you.”  It was a conundrum, I am sure, since the ones who chose to be beaten would see a beating as the only thing.  The ones who did not want to get beaten would fight or freeze or flee.  But, the ones who were in a good space would have seen more than the black or white.  They would have seen that gray area of alternatives:  giving the tea to the Master or sharing it with him?  I have been such a sneaky person, I’d have bribed someone else to drink it so they got the beating, I am sure.  *grin* We dismiss a lot of beautiful things when we label things all black or all white.

Sometimes our minds are so danged ignorant.  We choose to dismiss or ignore important things.  We choose narrow views and reasonings rather than open up to possibilities.  We choose to stay unaware and say, “A rose is a rose is a rose.”  I find this in people who are religion-obsessed and go about life in blind faith.  People can be so attached to an idea or a belief that they come across as pretentious, deceptive, shameless, inconsiderate, and disrespectful in their Ego-distraction.  I have been guilty of it to.  I remember when I was in University and was invited over to Kelowna to visit a friend’s family.  They spoke of boats and army subjects that I had no idea of.  I was lost.  I had such educational arena tunnel vision that I could not even relate.  I was quiet and Ego had me thinking I was a higher thinker than they.  Later, I was astounded to hear that they thought I was “rather high-minded”.  LOL.  I had been sitting their justifying my own “goodness”:  I didn’t drink.  I didn’t do drugs.  I didn’t carouse.  I had had no one-night stands.  I. I. I.  I was ignorant of their way of life as much as I was of mine.  Sure, they may have had their ways of dealing with life and so had I…my little invisible big ways.  After I got to know them through the years, they became like family.  Thank goodness they knew how to forgive my ignorance.

Labeling was a problem of mine.  I had my own little sets of rules, to-dos, not-to-dos, what was just and right for me and I applied this to all.  I generalized and labeled things and people and places, like saying “a rose is a rose is a rose”.  I had ideals and I idealized people, places and things.  I had to get over it, seriously.  Life irritated me, people irritated me, things irritated me.  I was in a constant state of irritation.  I also expected people to be mind readers, I guess, because I thought they should know what I know and what I expected.  I spent a lot of time feeling being let down because I had not accepted that I was not, never could be, should never try to be perfect because then I expected the same of them…but then, that was before I realized that everyone is perfectly perfect in the present moment.  I had a great deal of unrealistic labels for people, places and things.

As we label things, we decide with both heart and head not soul and spirit.  It is easy to clump people, places and things together.  The Ego loves that job.  However, it is wise not to be cautious.  There are times when intuition tells you what you need to know, who you should listen to, who you should steer clear of.  The harsh truth of life is sometimes necessary to feel, as well.  There are great lessons in them.  Labeling is simply a way of denying what the present moment is… it is a thief that robs us of Oneness encounters.  Labeling comes from the Ego.

As we try to stop labeling, the Ego will backtalk to us.  It will self-induce anxiety.  It will redirect emotions.  It will try to intellectualize according to its own story.  It will threaten, whip you into indecision so you are easier to handle as its source of nurture.  It will try to rationalize.  It will justify.  It will bring up its own proofs.  It will beg you to come back to that old thinking.  It will act out, big time.  It will tell you you are not entitled to change the rules of its tricks it is playing on you.  But persevere.  I am trying very hard to take out few moments and simply refuse to label.  It is very hard work to submit to this activity but I am doing this for  a spiritual purpose, and an active receptivity is beginning to become sustained as energy is exchanged with that person, place or things, and realization of Oneness is deepened.  I am un-conditioning/de-conditioning, little by little and I find my grass ever green.

“The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. Not at all. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be.” — Robert Fulghum, in It was On Fire When I Lay Down on It, Ivy Books, 1989

Satori

Satori:  a Japanese Buddhist term for enlightenment. The word literally means “understanding”. It is sometimes loosely used interchangeably with Kensho, but Kensho refers to the first perception of the Buddha-Nature or True-Nature, sometimes referred to as “awakening“. Kensho is not a permanent state of enlightenment, but rather a clear glimpse of the true nature of existence. Satori on the other hand is used to refer to “deep” or lasting enlightenment. It is therefore customary to use the word satori, rather than kensho, when referring to the enlightened states of the Buddha and the Patriarchs.  -Wikipedia

It is an individual lash of enlightenment coming from alert stillness.  Eckhart’s writing about the Zen Master. (p237 - 238) helped me understand that it is not the stream…or hearing the stream that brings Satori.  It is the listening, the alertness.  There are those moments when something seeps into awareness that simply IS and it is necessary to name it, label it or even know it.  It is that significant sudden happening when the senses are alert enough to know without knowing why or what.  Once we feel it, if we acknowledge it, we can learn to allow it to sustain.  The Zennist, Georgia, says, ” ” If your satori is anything perceptible, it is not genuine satori.”

Our problem is that we think too much.  We worry about fixing things, we worry overly about other’s needs and forget destiny, we want more and more and yet more, we find comfort in regrets, we want to understand everything including the impossible, we are overly concerned about things to worry about, we try to be too positive or too negative, we want to be in control, and we want everyone to approve or like us or hate us so we have reason to hate them back.  It’s a mess and such easy chaos to get into.  We tread water in mighty muddy waters.

Letting go, surrender, acceptance is frightening to the Ego.  But, if we do not learn it, we will always feel like we are in a type of hell and miss the wonder of earth-living as spiritual beings.  We find problems with being open-minded, with intuitive search for new ideas and understandings.  It only takes a short time in nature to understand that the world is not as we know it because we are living it through other’s understandings, leaning on others because we do not trust our own faith and mini-miracles of insight.  We are so conditioned that we forget everything is relative, conditioned and impermanent in form.

As for me and my house, we are finding ways to feel satori, to invite it, to allow it.  I have started my Medicine Wheel outside and working on making the backyard a peaceful place to meditate, for visitations of nature and spirit, and simply wait for it to all wash over me. I find it easiest to be Present outside when I am surrounded by cultural things that I create to express and invite spirituality.  That is sacred space to me.  I invite satori as I work on the singing hoops, the gardens, the sweat area.  I take no credit in anything other than trying to create spaciousness of peace and calm and invitation.

Ananda, Bliss - Recognizing Inner Space

Ananda, Bliss - Recognizing

There are so many mysteries in that inner space of mine.    I have sought to know some of them but usually they come when I do not seek.  There are those incredible moments of astounding peace that comes over me betimes, when I least expect them.  Those times come as Eckhart explains, as when I am listening to the sound of rain or wind, clouds scuttling across a wild blue sky, moments when a stranger moves me, and space is alive in me and around me.  A deep and abiding sense of well-being and contentment come over me… the feeling of ‘ananda’ - the bliss of Being.  (p234)

Eckhart says:  “You cannot become aware of yourself, because you are always aware of something else.  You are continually distracted by form.  Even when you seem to be aware…you have made yourself into an object, a thought form, and so what you are aware of is thought, not yourself.” (p233)And he also calls it “Sweetness of Being” (p235)  He quotes Nietzsche:  “For happiness, how little suffices for happiness!…the least thing precisely, the gentlest thing, the lightest thing, a lizard’s rustling, a breath, a wisk, an eye glance - little maketh up the best happiness.  Be still.” (p235

The saga of the soul’s journey is evoked in these moments: The happiness, peace and contentment of within.  It is not the thing that provoked it, but something within that surges to that moment, I feel.  Manifestations of the subconscious or infinite Universal consciousness take over as a door is opened for them.  There are really no secrets, merely closed doors that are waiting for that blink of an eye moment when I am ready for such profoundly evocative insight and experience.  “The heart knoweth, the soul never forgetteth.” (Edgar Cayce, Reading 5351-1)

The body is the soul’s shield, as well as its barrier.  The soul receives awareness through cracks in our everyday reality and is not restricted to this elastic skin that shrouds it.  It is a great ocean that ebbs and flows within us and sometimes crashes over the lip of consciousness and floods us with awe, peace, comfort, no matter the outside circumstances.  I truly believe we are spirits in human form and that, betimes, we feel that constriction.  It is evocatively drawn to experience the oneness and allows the physical form to experience that spiritual connection in moments of sublime peace and beauty and that awe I spoke of.    The body is a container, a temple, which connects the soul to earth and earthly matters that it, too, must learn to deal with.  Like body remembers the vessel that bore it, the soul also remembers Whom and What it was separated from. It longs for its home, as well.

Being closed off from the influence of soul closes the body off from those things that can stir the soul within.  We constantly feed body but ofttimes, in ignorance, starve our souls through the many ways that we deny it.  Our souls are never fulfilled and we waste our lives trying to fill it through non-spiritual ways.  It yearns and keens within us, for attention.  We feed body and the desire of the soul cannot attain that oneness it so needs and desires.  It continually engages the body in moments as signs of what is needed and if we do not bodily connect with it, we suffer.  Lord, how we suffer.

Connect to those moments of inner space and allow true spiritual tides to wash over us so that it can leave tidal pools of spiritual richness as reminders and signposts that we are still apart of the one.  Ananda Bliss!